The Art of Active Networking
If you read my last week's blog you'll see that I've been researching Kickstarter and trying to figure out how it all works and how it can be done right. In doing so, I have pledged to about 40 different campaigns in the period of about a week and a half. Surprisingly enough, out of the 40 campaigns, I received a "thank you" reply from just 3 different ones. Two of them were a copy/paste type of a message, and one was personal. Still that's more than 90% of the people running the campaign who wouldn't find the time to respond and just say "thank you". Let me clarify something - I'm not upset, I'm just surprised. Many of these campaigns reached their goal, but the girl who was kind enough to say "thanks" did not. That was enough for me. Now, once she's ready to move her campaign over to Seed & Spark, I will go out of my way, open an account at Seed & Spark, and re-pledge my contribution. Now, why do we do that?
Mark E. Sackett (check out his TEDx Talk) always says that as individuals we want to work with people we know, likeand trust. I couldn't agree more. It really has to be those three for me. Sometimes I'm capable of replacing the "like" with "respect", but in most circumstances, all three factors need to be met.
- We need to knowsomeone, because at some point in our lives we've all made bad assumptions, and even though someone might seem like a great person, there might be some red flags that we weren't able to see at a first glance.
- Once we know that person, we'll be able to evaluate whether we can trustthem. We need this because we want to feel comfortable around that person.
- And we need to likethem, which is the easiest to achieve and at the same time the easiest to lose.
We make snap judgements all the time, and we can decide whether we like someone or not based on the very first words that come out of their mouth. Those first impressions are extremely important. The more you seem like someone who just wants to sell something or get something from others with nothing in return, the less likely people will like you. It's as simple as that.
Which brings me to #mygive4. Mark, if you're reading this, I don't mean to misrepresent what your company is all about, but this is how I see it. I've gone to Mark's meetup about 5 or 6 times already, and I've met some wonderful people there. One thing that stands out about each and every person that I put in that circle is the fact that they are not "takers". Each time, Mark tries to put the entire group in a "giving" mode, then everyone gets their 30 seconds to say what they do and what they're passionate about, which gives everyone else in the room an opportunity to help that person achieve their goals. Even if you can't help anyone in any way, you see others that try. That gives you a different perspective on life. Something we've been taught (like saying "please" and "thank you"), but we have possibly forgotten.
As an adult, we can tell when someone is trying to sell us something, especially if they only have 30 seconds to do so. Luckily we've just wasted 30 seconds on them instead of the entire night of standing there and having them try to sell me life insurance while I could have been talking with anyone else. So, why do I write this here on IADB's blog? Because it applies to everyone and everything. In our daily lives, we try to accomplish something each and every day. Pursuing our passion of becoming a filmmaker or an actor or whatnot. When you do that, try not to sell yourself, instead of constantly taking (or trying to take), try to give back. It doesn't have to be a monetary thing. You could offer up your time, or your talents. By being a giver, you will quickly gain the advantage over the Narcissists that only care about their own well-being.
